[To all readers, Dr. Ninja loves you very much!  Critical has hurt feelings cause you don't ask his advice, but Dr. Ninja has always said that Critical is sissy-boy who cry too much, so Dr. Ninja is laughing right now at Critical.  Come, laugh with Dr. Ninja at Critical.  Hah hah haa!]

Dear Dr. Ninja,

My best friend (female) recently offered me $500 to dump my boyfriend. Upon hearing my story, another friend (male) also offered me $500 to dump my boyfriend. What do you think I should do?

-Fashiongrrl :)
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Dear Fashiongrrrrrrrl:

Dr. Ninja much appreciate your comment...Dr. Ninja have two comments for you, then give you special advice.
1) Dr. Ninja think name spelled with rr's very sexxy.  Dr. Ninja might just become Drr. Ninja, to be sexy too.
2) Dr. Ninja sorry about Mrs. Ninja. Maybe if you and Dr. Ninja met in Ninja Medical School, when Dr. was still single ninja.......but, never think about what might have been.  Dr. Ninja do not sit thinking about past, because then Dr. Ninja might regret not severing head of an enemy, or not having cool eyepatch.  Ok, so advice time.
Dr. Ninja think not all facts are obvious (like ninja facts!), so Dr. Ninja hesitate to give advice about complicated subject involving feelings and intricate relationships between two people who might be in love...but, cash money rule world, so $1,000 is better than love any day.  Dr. Ninja think you should dump boyfriend, because it take courage for friends to speak ill of boyfriend - meaning even though friends joke, they hate boyfriend maybe just a little.  You may have reservations, like perhaps boyfriend have big wang or nice car - but, all relationships doomed to fail, so at least you get money when this one go in toilet.  Dr Ninja hope you make right choice for you - because for some people, big wang beat money.  Remember, if true love, then boyfriend should be willing to pay you $1500 to stay with him - either way, you big winner!

grrrrrr,
Dr. Ninja